At the beginning of the night I made a request to play a
few specific special format games including Shadows, Dead Aim and Highlander.
All these games went ok, but just not good enough for me. I have high
expectations for myself and need to remember that I’m not here to prove
anything to anyone else. And yet I feel like I need a do-over (I suppose that’s
what next week will be) because my ego got hammered all night long. The group I
played with was decent and certainly made me work harder than I expected. And
when that proved to not be enough (in these public games no less!) it really
made me take a step back. I’m not satisfied with my own performance from last
night because I didn’t meet my own expectations and I guess that just means I
need another “rehearsal” to get myself back on track. However, if I’m going to
have an off night it’s way better that it happen here and now when it doesn’t matter
rather than later on when it counts.
It may not have helped that I got a huge build up at the
beginning of the night with an introduction as a “tournament player” that
always turns me into more of a “trophy target”. Personally I prefer to be
underestimated at the start and over-deliver by the end. But I’m not
complaining and it clearly did set the bar higher. I suppose the night both did
and un-did exactly what I needed it to. It did give me a decent go around with
the formats I wanted to work on. And it un-did any premature sense of “I got
this” that might have been floating around in my head just because I happened
to win the last time I played this event that I’m prepping for. After a game
of…what was it, Royal Rumble?...when I got eliminated earlier than anticipated
Tom asked me what happened with a bit of disbelief and all I could say was that
this was just not my night and on some nights getting your ego beaten down is a
good thing as it keeps you from becoming (fill in the blank) too full of yourself.
So a little bit of humble pie can be beneficial too. I know my place in the LF
spectrum and I think what I gained from last night is a reminder that even
though I’m choosing to be in different kinds of competition than some others
from this site, when it’s “show time” I need to be ready to play as hard as I
can and not take anything for granted. So I will consider last night a
beneficial practice, albeit a REALLY bad dress rehearsal and take only the
positive from it to put into making a great show. :)
Comments or Questions?
Contact: tivia@tiviachickloveslasertag.com
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